Control Issues

I hate flying in airplanes. And the simple reason is, I'm not the one driving. And therefore, if something goes wrong, there's not a damn thing I can do about it.

When I worked in newspapers, I had the chance to fly in a number of stunt planes on media days leading up to the annual Friendship Festival in Fort Erie. I found I was most comfortable in the open-cockpit biplane. Pretty sure it was a Stearman, but it was a long time ago. Anyway, there were two reasons I was comforted as we did barrel rolls, hammerheads and loops. One, I had a parachute on my back and two, I could undo the seatbelt and get off this ride if necessary, "in the event of an unfortunate incident," I think is how the pilot put it. Not sure if this makes me a control freak or not, but it's just the way I am. The bottom line is that I had some control over my destiny that is not afforded in a 747.

(My pilot in the biplane that day, by the way, died in a head-on collision with a fellow stunt pilot a few years after I flew with him. No parachute would have helped that day.)

So why am I going on about this? Well, it's the IRP and the CRSP; the HHT and the HHE. Yes, I pointed out in a previous post that it appears the RCMP takes care of its people. Still believe it. But I am having some trouble trusting the system. Mostly because I don't trust most "systems" designed to "help me out."

Call it a control thing.

Yes, there are monetary benefits in the IRP, but there is, at the very least, a feeling that I've lost some control over the sale of my home. And that's difficult to take. Before I can even list our home, I must submit to two appraisals by folks out of Winnipeg. My wife and I must sign several waivers and permissions. And then, when we list our home, we were told, it would be "in our best interest" to list it close to what the Winnipeg appraisers say it's worth.

I'm not sure why it would be "in our best interest" to do so. I wasn't on the phone at the time, so I didn't get the chance to ask. But it would seem to me that what is in my best interest is to get as much as I possibly can for my home. Call me crazy. I also have some concerns regarding a Winnipeg appraiser's ability to accurately assess the value of a home in the Gimli market. And believe me, with the housing prices in Thompson, we need to get every penny out of this house.

So as I was hyperventilating and venting these concerns yesterday, my wife told me to chill out. The RCMP has moved a lot of people. We haven't heard too many complaints. They know what they're doing: relax control freak. Sit back in your seat, keep the tray in an upright position and enjoy the flight.

So that's what I'm trying my level best to do. There are still at least three months to go in this process and I don't need the acid in my stomach to eat right through before it's all over.

I realize I can't fly this plane. But between the CRSP, the Relocation Reviewer (don't know why she didn't get an acronym), my wife, the real estate agent, the lawyer and the RCMP, I fear I may become a passenger on this 747 headed north. That is my concern. If I can't fly the plane, I would at least like to be co-pilot, or navigator or something. And, if I can't be any of those people, I want a parachute and a seat by the door.