It doesn't seem right.

All righty. Tuesday and I'm doing a slow burn. And no, it's not about the leaking valve.

But it is about another government body, and its treatment of people.

This one began about a month ago. I came home to find a Manitoba Hydro truck in my driveway. The guy was apparently just finishing up whatever it was he was doing.

And, being a naturally curious kinda guy when it comes to strange trucks in my driveway, I asked. Turns out he had just replaced the electrical meter on the side of my house. 

"Hmmm," thought I. "Why would he do that?"

So I asked him. "Why did you do that?"

And I learned that the meter on my house was defective. It wasn't working. And it had not been working since February 29. It was September 10. So, for a little more than six months, no meter. No one was measuring how much electricity I was, or wasn't using.

Now, as I had paid several electrical bills over that time period, I was a little concerned as to how these bills were calculated. I mean, really, do they just get to guess at this stuff?

"Based on last year, we figured you used X. So just pay that, okay?"

Um, no, not okay. Did you know I was away for a month in the summer camping? Did you know I replaced our giant front window just before winter? Did you know we've been taking every step to reduce our electrical bill? Did you know I installed a generator in the garage in the spring and have been using it, instead of your electricity for most of the summer?

Okay, that last one's a lie. But hey, nobody has asked me. And the first three are true. 

So, when meter installer guy left, I called Manitoba Hydro. And I asked what was going on. And I was told that my meter had been out of service (broken) since February 29. I asked about the bills I have been paying. The customer service rep and I had a hard time understanding each other, I admit. But what I got from the phone call was that, apparently, I was paying my bill (their estimate) once every other month. The next month, it was refunded, minus the "basic charge." 

I was not entirely clear on how that all worked, or why. I do recall asking if it was even legal to charge me for electricity when there was no proof that I used any.

Fast forward a month.

I got the letter. It began "Dear Customer:"

Could they at least use my name. I mean, I like to get kissed before I get fucked. I realize a kiss is out of the question, but at least know and use my name, eh?

Stay on track . . .

The letter continued:

"We have estimated consumption to cover February 29, 2012 to September 10, 2012. Based on 9,130 kW.h consumption recorded on the previous meter for the 183 day period from March 1, 2011 to August 31, 2011, there is daily consumption of 50 kW.h. For the period from February 29, 2012 to September 10, 2012, consumption based on this would have been 50kW.h multiplied by 194 days for a total of 9,700 kW.h. To allow for any inaccuracies in our estimate, 10% or 907 kW.h was deducted resulting in an estimate of 8,730 kW.h"

Bottom line: I now owe them just shy of $600. Payable now. 

I have a few questions. First off, I gotta ask why it took more than six months to replace a broken meter? Second, was the meter working properly up to that point? And please don't automatically say yes. It's not like you jumped on the problem when it stopped working altogether.

And finally, and most importantly, on what planet, and in what business transaction can the supplier say to the customer, "We have absolutely no proof, but we figured you bought this much. Pay for it! Further, we have a mechanism for accurately measuring consumption, but it broke six months ago. It is our responsibility to fix it, but we just didn't get to it. So just pay up."

It would be like buying meat from a butcher. His scale breaks. He doesn't tell you. He just throws the meat on, gives you a number and asks for the money. After six months, he confesses, because you ask about that fancy new scale he has. He refunds some of your money (keeps some as a "basic service fee") and then bills you several hundred dollars for your meat purchases over the last six months . . . based on the previous year's meat purchases. 

What's more, he does it by mail. Just sends you a bill. Would you pay it? Should you pay it?

Okay, this is gonna take more than one post. So I'm just gonna leave you with this for today:

The "basic charge" that I was told I still had to pay during the six months of broken meter? According to my letter and bill from Manitoba Hydro, it is "The fixed charge that pays part of the cost of providing service and does not depend on how much energy is used."

Okay, fair enough. But it goes on:

"It helps pay for such items as the maintenance of meters, the cost of meter reading, billing and record keeping."

Um . . . should I REALLY have been paying that during the six months my meter was broken? Just asking.

I have some research to do and a few phone calls to make to sort this out.

Have a stress-free Tuesday.