Where Do They Come Up With This Stuff?

**Disclaimer**

If you're not a parent of young children, if you've never seen Treehouse, just skip this one. If not, read on.

" . . . and then we would steal Caillou's cake. (Much laughter.)

Sometimes, when I'm not really paying attention, these little phrases from the minions slip past my subconscious. My well-honed practice of blocking of all things Treehouse, and subsequent commentary, fails me. Last night was one of those nights.

It surprised me to hear my innocent (ha!) three-year-old hatching a cake-theft plot against a four-year-old cartoon character on television.

"I wanna punch him in the face and steal his cake," Sonwun responds, to more evil laughter.

Now they've got my full attention. What, exactly, did Caillou do to warrant such action? Where do they come up with this stuff? And how good is that cake?

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not a Caillou fan. The bald little brat whines way too much and, I'm afraid, I've heard the whiny echoes in Sontoo's voice as he protests anything from taking a nap to going to the library. It seems he does it out of habit anymore. Any suggestion I put forth these days is met immediately by "but I don't waaaanna (fill in the blank)."

It's kinda like Caillou's catch phrase. And I don't like it.

Anyhoo, last night, after hearing my boys' plans for theft and assault, I decided to reacquaint myself with Caillou, just to see what had inspired this cake-theft plot.

The cake episode had apparently ended, but thanks to the miracle of Netflix, a new episode was beginning. And in this episode, it was bath night at Caillou's house.

"I don't waaaanna take a bath," Caillou told his way-to-accommodating parents, before running away and hiding.

So, to make a long, insipid story short, Caillou's stupid parents do their stupid best to make bath time "fun." They supply bubble bath (fair enough) and then they allow the little brat to start splashing around in the tub and, in the end, everyone ends up soaking wet.

Now, it's not shown, but experience tells me if the parents are soaking wet, there is serious water damage in the bathroom. And here's the kicker, rather than scolding the bald little brat Caillou's parents laugh at the kid's wacky antics, much to the delight of my minions. I mean, how much fun are Caillou's parents? They not only allow tidal waves in the tub, they encourage them! They're the best parents ever!

Did I mention last night was bath night?

As such, I delivered a longer-than-usual pre-bath speech/warning. Sure, they got bubble bath. I'm not an ogre. But tidal waves, as usual, were forbidden, as was splashing, squirting and bathing of the cats.

For the most part, the speech worked. But still riding the Caillou high, there was a little more splashing and a little more water on the floor when it was all over. This does not make me happy and this episode at my house does not end with laughter.

I just wanna punch Caillou's daddy in the face. And then steal his cake.